What's Been Going On

What a crazy week and a half it has been!  It's been one of those weeks where EVERYTHING got away from me.  Because Alexa had spring break (last week), it seemed as though I was always taking her here and there.  We didn't have any plans for Spring Break, again.  It seems that we really enjoy doing absolutely nothing during spring break.  I say absolutely nothing, but there was always something to do.  Whether Alexa was hosting friends, which she did about four days that week (more about this later) or track practice or taking her to her friends, we were on the go.   I'm still praying that God will provide a way for us to make a trip to California this year.  Alexa was seven the last time we visited with family in California.  It's time to go.  Too much time has passed and my little girl is now a growing young lady.  Not to mention our new addition.  It's time to go.  We'll see what can be done (fingers crossed).

Since bringing Alayah home, we have gone through some serious changes.   The obvious change has been having another family member.   We really feel blessed and amazed at the little girl God chose for us (more about this later).   Another change we have been experiencing is this year's budget, or lack of.  lol!  It almost reminds me of our younger years when it seemed we were getting nowhere financially.  BUT  this experience has humbled us and has opened MY eyes to what is most important in this world.  With our adoption complete we are now tackling some small loans.  With post adoption visits we have had to pay hundreds more per visit. It looks like we have one more.  Thank you, Jesus. 

This process has changed me.  This journey has shown me things I thought I had always known.  For example, I'm totally disgusted by how many pairs of shoes my family has.  I counted sixty pairs between the four of us, not including the many I have stored in shoe boxes (didn't want to disgust you too).   I hate how many jackets/coats I own.  Before I give you a number on my coats, I must confess that I have a bit of a coat fetish.  Moving to the cold Midwest, just did some crazy things to me.  I love coats.  I have about twelve (maybe...I didn't count).  Purses, um, well, I sort of have a fetish with those too.  My walk-in closet is filled with clothes, some I haven't ever wore (still working on those extra pounds; more on that later).  These are just my things.  Should I even get started on Alexa's things?  Alayah has not even been here a year and she has enough shoes and clothes for two kiddos!   To put it into perspective, I gave a bag of Alexa's clothes and a bag of Alayah's clothes away just recently and their closets are still full!  I'm disgusted!  And here's why.  WE HAVE TOO MUCH! 

I used to watch The Real Housewives of Orange County, it gave me a connection to California, my stomping ground.  I didn't watch it all the time.  I have probably watched ten episodes total.  And then I stopped because I started noticing that I was becoming envious of all their things.  So a year and a half go by and we do something completely out of our comfort zone, we decide to adopt internationally.  And something happened.  My eyes were opened, really opened, to what was truly important to God. 

A couple months ago I turned on the TV during Alayah's nap.  Nothing was on, except The Real Housewives of New York.  I was bored and decided it wouldn't hurt.  BUT it did hurt.  I saw these women with their designer bags, shoes, fake this and fake that, being driven around town by a personal driver...and I choked up.  I thought of how many children around the world could be fed by one designer bag.  These women were on their way to shop for designer gowns, at $12,000 a pop!  I was DISGUSTED.  I wasn't impressed, not even in the least.  I thought about how at one time, I would have loved to know women like them.  I would have loved to step into their lives and just see what it was truly like.  But on this day, I was embarrassed for them.  Flaunting their money while many others wonder if they will eat that day.  I was disgusted and embarrassed.  I turned the TV off and wept.  I held on to my Lord and apologized for the world's selfishness, my own selfishness. 

While reading Radical, by David Platt, I learned that God blessed us so we could in turn bless others  not so we can buy more shoes, purses etc.  And although we made some pretty huge sacrifices to bring Alayah home, (and still trying to recover from them) I don't think it ends there.  I will never look at a Coach bag the way I used to.  Don't get me wrong, I will always like pretty things.  I will always enjoy shopping.  But it will be different.  It HAS been different.

So weird, this post wasn't even supposed to be about this.  I guess I needed to get this "world of stuff" off my chest.  Spend wisely friends.  And pray that I will continue to see what the Lord is showing us during this "budget time."