One year ago, on Memorial Day, we met our daughter Alayah Derartu. It was a moment that brought upon many emotions. The day was finally here; we were finally here, in Ethiopia. The photo of our beautiful little girl, with that contagious smile, was finally in our arms. How did we get here? How did two teenagers whom fell in love over twenty-two years ago find themselves in this third-world country? Why did God choose us for this? Were we strong enough for this? Too many questions to ponder. And yet the journey continues with many of these questions answered.
The adoption process was, in many respects, unbelievable. God "showed up" countless times, getting us through obstacles that seemed impossible. Whether it were finances, paperwork, deadlines or lack of support from family and friends, God carried us through with two words: Trust Me.
Trusting God is often times harder than trusting others. It might be because trusting Him means having faith during times when you just want to "throw in the towel." There were many times when we felt this way. There was never a time more unsettling than our stay in Ethiopia. Our expectations were far greater than they should have been. Even though we promised ourselves we would not have unrealistic expectations...we did. More questions surfaced. Did we make a mistake? What were we thinking? Will we truly love her? But the defining question was...did God make a mistake?
It was hard. Ethiopia was hard. Those who traveled with us (other adoption families), witnessed us unraveling. What were our options? Would we bring her home? Would we bring this "uncertainty" to our peaceful home?
We kept looking back at the adoption process. There were too many unexplained miracles. It couldn't have been a mistake. Faith got us through. Support from family and friends back in America got us through. God got us through.
An email from my mother-in-law confirmed what we were questioning while we were in Addis Ababa and I'd like to share it.
Steve and Tina, I'm sorry for the stress that everyone is going through, and I know it must break your hearts to see the anxiety the children are feeling. Please remember, this won't last- it is temporary. It's understandable that Alayah Derartu will be very clingy for awhile- she has gone through more than we can ever know in her young life. Remember that God sent your family to little Alayah Derartu: remember that "there is a time and a season for every purpose under heaven"-this is that time, and (as you know) there is a purpose for all of this. Don't second-guess yourselves; you're all exactly where you are supposed to be, and I'm sure there will be many lessons that will come out of this. Listen to the Lord-keep Him close, and He will guide you every step of the way. Climb into His lap when you are scared and unsure, just like Alayah climbs into yours.
Alexa entered your lives at birth, it gave you time to get to know her- you are on a crash course with Alayah Derartu, but you are both older, wiser and more patient-that's why you were chosen to be her parents. Remember- you didn't choose this, you were chosen FOR this. You had an appointment in time, scheduled by the Lord; He will assist you in carrying out His plan and you will all be SO BLESSED for following His lead! Everything that you have both gone through in your lives has shaped you and brought you to this place and this time-how exciting for all of you!
Know that you are all in our prayers; I'm so proud of you all.
Love, Mom
I'm so thankful that God used my mother-in-law to encourage us with these words. Words that had escaped us while in Ethiopia. Many family members and friends carried us with their prayers and those prayers were certainly felt.
Fast forward one year later....GOD DOES NOT MAKE MISTAKES! If you know Alayah, you know what a blessing she is, (even if she is a little headstrong sometimes). lol! We celebrate today what God has done, not just for Alayah, but for Steve, Alexa and myself. God does indeed have a purpose for this little girl. From the time He gave us her name, to the time she came home, this little girl sees her God everyday...and so do we.
Our daughter is smart, beautiful, witty, friendly (she can make a friend ANYWHERE), and bold, sometimes even too bold. But it was God whom designed her. God loved her from the very beginning. And all these characteristics will be used for His Glory.
God chose Memorial Day to bring us together. Memorial Day will not only be a day of remembering those who have helped make this an excellent country, but it will also be a day we remember what our Mighty God has done! We will remember every doubt; every tear; every answered prayer and every miracle. Memorial Day will have an even greater meaning to our family than ever before...it's the day God chose to complete our family! He couldn't have picked a more perfect day. I will always remember.
" ...but Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often." Luke 2:19
May you find faith in your obstacles today and may you be encouraged by two words: Trust Him.
Blessings,
Your MIL's letter made me cry. I remember well how high the emotions were for you guys during the trip. We prayed for you often during that week, and after we got home. I remember telling Nate that I hoped we could keep in touch because I just knew that at the year mark you'd be able to look back and see how God orchestrated every moment. Not because I have special premonitions (hehe), but because I remember looking back at the year mark of bringing our boys home and feeling that way. During that week in Ethiopia, we were also struggling--a LOT. The girls were hyper and liked to run away from us, and I could not believe how much more difficult and exhausting it was compared to our first experience. I had so many fears and anxieties. And now I can't believe that it's ONLY been a year. :) So happy for you guys. P.S. I love porches. We have a small front porch, but bushes are in our way, so it does not get used...
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