A "Chance" Encounter

Since thinking about health, and yes, my age, I've been back on the treadmill. However this past Friday I contemplated whether I would jump on the dreaded thing or go to Walmart (I know, exciting, right?). When you've been indoors day in and day out due to mounds and mounds of this...

...you sometimes just want to get out... even if it's Walmart. Needless to say, I didn't argue with myself much. Something urged me to skip the treadmill and go to Walmart...so I did. After changing out of pjs, I fluffed out Alayah's hair (always worried about African American women judging my inexperience with Alayah's hair. Another confession of mine) and we were on our way.

I wanted to find cute hair clips for Alayah, so we visited the hair accessories first, which happens to be where African American hair products are found (a recent favorite aisle of mine). I scanned the clips and didn't see anything I liked. I settled on some styling clips while an African American woman searched the nearby hair products...

I'll get back to that in a moment:

You see, sadly, I've been challenged with Alayah's hair. I have visited many websites and blogs that are devoted entirely to African American hair (my favorite is listed in the sidebar). I've been trying many products and still have not found anything that I'm happy with. It has left me discouraged. I'm even more discouraged when I see an African American child with loose curls. I remember thinking to myself, why couldn't she (Alayah) have "that" kind of hair (the dreaded hair envy). I thought of other families who have journeyed a similar road (adoption) and realized that every one of them had children with loose curls. Did I mention how discouraged I was? When I thought heavily about this reality something quickly came to mind, "YOU HAVE THE TIME." I write that in caps because I believe that the Holy Spirit was helping me embrace this fact. I thought about this...."you have the time." I later realized that the other families, whose children donned the envious loose curls, had four to five children! I believe God understands the level of maintenance hair can be. I began to let go of the hair envy and began to see that these bigger families could use some extra help in the hair department...Me, I have a thirteen-year-old whom combs her own hair and has been doing so for several years. I HAVE THE TIME. Alayah WAS and IS the perfect match for me!

That said, I'm still CLUELESS! But I'm hopeful. I told myself that "one day" I would approach an African American lady, with child, and just come out and say something like, "I love your daughters style, what products do you use?" Unfortunately, it's been nine months and I still haven't found the courage to do it.

So back to Walmart...This woman was holding a particular brand of hair product. Alayah was saying, "Mommy, get this one." The woman looked over at us and smiled. I stood there watching her, trying to find the courage to approach her. I didn't want this opportunity to pass. "Do you like that product?" I asked, worried about how that question would be received. She never hesitated. We stood there for ten minutes talking about hair and products. I blurted out as many questions as Alayah would allow and she answered willingly. She touched Alayah's hair and showed me a cute little twist style ( which by the way Alayah hated, not the style, but the poking and prodding by a stranger). She quickly shared the many hair supply stores in the area and apologized for sharing so much. I said, "Not at all, this really is an answer to prayer." She smiled and continued. I asked her if she lived in my town, she said no, but one nearby. She said that she had some friends in my town. She named one, Sara S. I stood there stunned, "Sara S. is a good friend of mine!" She said, "Really? Sara used to attend my church." (She's a Christian to boot, I thought to myself.) And we both laughed at the "coincidence." She asked how old Alayah was and shared that she had a four-year-old daughter too!! She asked me if I wouldn't mind exchanging numbers. With pure excitement I fumbled for my phone and added her to my contacts. She said, "We should get our girls together." I happily agreed, while Alayah continued to cry because, well, she wanted gum. Yes... tears for gum!

I left Walmart with misty eyes. I praised God all the way home. Something told me to skip the treadmill and go to Walmart. I'm so glad I braved the elements. Later that day I called her and she invited Alayah and I to McDonald's Playplace for this upcoming Friday!!

I just love "Chance" encounters.

By the way, I tried a new hairstyle on Alayah and managed to get most of her snarls out while she watched Snow White! Yippee! It's gonna take a while, but I'm gonna get good at this hair thing, I promise.